Stories of a single mother raising four kids after her divorce while trying to reinvent herself, including dating again

Feelings aren’t Facts

As I walked by my bedroom, I noticed my mother doing something that made me stop and stare. With fingers strategically place on her forehead and cheeks, she tugged at the sagging skin as she examined her reflection in the mirror. In my sixteen-year-old mind, I thought, How strange. So, I asked as only a teenager would, “What the hell are you doing?”

Startled at being caught, she quickly leaned back and replied, “Nothing.”

“Mom, you were pulling at your skin,” I persisted. “Is everything alright?”

After […]

Counting Steps

With my iPhone securely in hand and music gently swirling through my ears, I made the trek to the Rancho San Antonio hiking trails for my daily 10,000 steps. Soaking in the beauty of nature, I walked at a fast clip, up the steep trails, back down again, and finally reaching an expansive meadow. Proud of the sweat dripping down my face, I checked the health app on my phone to see how far I’d gone past my goal.

Crap! I’ve only walked 8,000 steps. […]

Dusting Off My Internal GPS

After an all-day excursion exploring San Diego County, it was time to return to the home I was house sitting for the weekend. Knowing I’m a woman with no sense
of direction, I pulled out my phone, entered the address, and waited for the English voice of Nigel from Google Maps to begin directing me.

In 600 feet, take Highway 5 South to San Diego and travel 20 miles.

 I began my journey, confident that Nigel would get me there.

Then I heard, In one mile, take the […]

A Mother’s Birthright

 

Tiptoeing into our hotel room just past 1:00 am, with her Betty Davis hazel eyes sparkling brightly, my daughter Jenni instantly became confused when I had an explosive “Mommy moment.”

“Where in the hell have you been!” I yelled. Just like back in high school when she’d missed her curfew, I was furious. “This is Mexico, for God’s sake. Something bad could have happened to you and I wouldn’t know it.”

Lifting up my cell phone and waving it wildly in her face, I continued, […]

Past, Present, or Future?

With cries bellowing from the nursery, I rushed in to save the day. I was sure my grandson needed me. After all, I’m his Grammie, the baby whisperer. Sitting in bed, with snot running down his face, he continued wailing even after I picked him up. I finally realized it wasn’t me he wanted, but his favorite stuffed animal, Lovey, that had fallen out of his crib.

Cuddling him close, I gave Lovey back, but just as I did, he dropped it to the floor […]

My Year of Asking for Help

Standing in my bedroom in 1974, my mother schooled me once again with her steps for finding the perfect job. Having heard it all before, I wanted to scream. At twenty-two years old, I was now a college graduate and, in my snarky opinion, no longer needed her advice.

But, as I pounded the streets of San Francisco’s financial district in my long, homemade jean skirt covered in embroidered flowers and a peasant blouse that slid down my right shoulder, I began to wonder if […]